Chapter 117
Culture Shock/Reverse Culture Shock (RCS)
I have always heard that when you go to other countries you can experience culture shock because some things can be so different than what you are used to in your own country. It can be difficult to adjust to the differences. There are a lot of things very different between the American and Chinese cultures.
For those that have not experienced RCS, it will be difficult for them to understand what I am saying here. They may even shake their head or laugh because they won’t believe the little things that bothered me. Anyone that has not gone through it probably won’t be able to understand it no matter how it is explained to them. I didn’t realize until after I’d been back for a while about RCS. I looked it up online and realized what it was and that is what I was going through.
The first time that I went to China was in April of 2002 with the LLFA-La Crosse Luoyang Friendship Association. La Crosse and Luoyang became sister cities in 1997. I moved to La Crosse in May of 1998. During the winter of 1999, I had seen an advertisement for the Chinese New Year celebration so I went to see what it was. It was a small celebration in a room in a church. The second time was a year later and then I found out about the LLFA and started going to the meetings. There were sixteen of us that went on that trip. We went to Beijing for three days, Luoyang for six days, then to Shanghai for three days and visited Hangzhou while we were there.
After that trip, we came back to La Crosse where I spent the summer and then I went back to Luoyang on August 20, 2002 to teach English and start my adventure in China. I did not experience culture shock. I was open to everything and learned. I watched others and how they did things, like how they ate and what to do. I learned how to live the life there.
My problems began when I came back home in the US in July of 2004. I had reverse culture shock for one year. It was awful. I had a terrible time adjusting to living here. The hardest thing for me to handle in China that first time, and even the second time although it wasn’t as bad as the first time, was being watched all the time. After I came back here, if I would go out for a walk and I was where there were very few people on the streets and I would see someone coming on my side of the street one or two blocks away, I would cross the street to the other side so I wouldn’t have to meet them. When I went into stores, I wouldn’t look around to see who was there because I didn’t want to talk to anyone.
After I had been home for two weeks, I had put in an application to work at the Company Store. I didn’t want to work with people. I grew up at a resort by Lake Poinsett South Dakota. My mom ran the resort and my dad farmed. As I grew up, I would help at the resort during the summers so I was used to dealing with people. We had a little store and people would come in to buy things like ice cream, pop, candy and we also had a few groceries. I would take reservations for the cabins on the phone.
Working at the Company Store would be talking to people on the phone and taking orders for the things that the company sold. The training at the Company Store was for two weeks. At the end of the first week, I almost quit because I couldn’t catch on how to do things on the computer and do what was needed to take orders. Somehow I made it through the second week and was hired.
Even after I started working, I really had to concentrate when I was on the phone talking to people, taking their orders and looking up things on the computer to get information for them. I didn’t realize until sometime later, maybe months, that the reason I was having so much trouble during training and other things was because I was going through reverse culture shock. I started back to work too soon. I should have waited longer and given myself more time to adjust to being back here but I didn’t know about RCS at the time.
I had been in China for two years, I didn’t come home during the summer of 2003 and have a break from being there. I don’t know if that would have made a difference or not. I had a very good time during that summer. I did lots of things with friends and also worked on lessons for the second year. I was really glad that I stayed that summer.
I did not have RCS the second time I was in Luoyang. I did come home during the summers. I don’t know if that made a difference or if it was because I had lived there before and I knew what life was like and had adapted.
At the Company Store, I worked Monday through Friday and every other weekend. Before I went to Luoyang in 2002, I had been going to a church in La Crosse. I am not sure how long I’d been back when I decided to go to church one Sunday, maybe within a couple of months after I returned. I was already to go and decided not to. What happens when you have been gone from somewhere and then return? People are happy to see you and say-how are you, nice to see you, how was China? Etc. etc. I just couldn’t handle that.
I couldn’t handle the attention. I had so much of that in China. A little more time went by and I decided to go to a church that one of my cousins went to. I had been there a few times in the past. I drove there, got a couple of blocks away and I started to get panicky thinking about what would happen. I parked about a block away and sat there and decided not to go. I went back home. I wasn't ready yet. Those are just a couple of things that happened. The adjustment of being back was difficult.
I had come back here from China at the beginning of July, 2004 and there were two teachers that came here from Luoyang in August to teach Chinese in two of the high schools. They are friends of mine. One day in October, after being here for a couple of months, I asked them how they were doing and how they were adjusting to being here. They said they were doing fine. I told them that I was having trouble adjusting to being back. They kind of laughed. They couldn’t understand that. I don’t blame them. How could you not feel comfortable where your home is and the country that you are from?
I did not have RCS the second time I was in Luoyang. I did come home during the summers. I don’t know if that made a difference or if it was because I had lived there before and I knew what life was like and had adapted.
At the Company Store, I worked Monday through Friday and every other weekend. Before I went to Luoyang in 2002, I had been going to a church in La Crosse. I am not sure how long I’d been back when I decided to go to church one Sunday, maybe within a couple of months after I returned. I was already to go and decided not to. What happens when you have been gone from somewhere and then return? People are happy to see you and say-how are you, nice to see you, how was China? Etc. etc. I just couldn’t handle that.
I couldn’t handle the attention. I had so much of that in China. A little more time went by and I decided to go to a church that one of my cousins went to. I had been there a few times in the past. I drove there, got a couple of blocks away and I started to get panicky thinking about what would happen. I parked about a block away and sat there and decided not to go. I went back home. I wasn't ready yet. Those are just a couple of things that happened. The adjustment of being back was difficult.
I had come back here from China at the beginning of July, 2004 and there were two teachers that came here from Luoyang in August to teach Chinese in two of the high schools. They are friends of mine. One day in October, after being here for a couple of months, I asked them how they were doing and how they were adjusting to being here. They said they were doing fine. I told them that I was having trouble adjusting to being back. They kind of laughed. They couldn’t understand that. I don’t blame them. How could you not feel comfortable where your home is and the country that you are from?
When they went back to China the following summer of 2005, one of them had a difficult time eating Chinese food and the other one had a difficult time teaching school after being in the schools here. Other teachers had to adjust to the noise after being gone from China for a year and the air was not as clean back in China. Adjusting to many more people there and it was dirtier. The teachers all had adjustments to make when they went back to China.
You don’t know what the effects will be on you when you have been away and you return to your home country. If someone goes to a country for a short time, there may not be any effects, they may have to be in another country for maybe up to one year to see any effects from being there. You don't realize what your country is like until you have been gone for some time and then return and then you may realize the differences.
You don’t know what the effects will be on you when you have been away and you return to your home country. If someone goes to a country for a short time, there may not be any effects, they may have to be in another country for maybe up to one year to see any effects from being there. You don't realize what your country is like until you have been gone for some time and then return and then you may realize the differences.
When I would read the news online about things going on back in the US, I couldn't believe the things that were going on. When you live in another country and you see your world back home, you see things from the outside and you see things differently. You change. I had changed. I had lived in another world, the Asian world. I had been gone for two years. I had become part of their world. That will never change. After living there for five years, the Asian world will always be in me. Every day, I think of my friends and my life there.
It took over one year for the reverse culture shock to wear off. I had come home on July 5, 2004 and the RCS ended in August of 2005. All of a sudden it was over. One day it was gone. It is different for each person and how they experience it.
I found the following article online and it may help explain culture shock and reverse culture shock better.
The Four Stages of Culture Shock
1. Honeymoon Stage
This happens during the first few days and weeks of being in a new country. People experience emotions like euphoria, excitement, anticipation and eagerness. Everyone and everything is exciting.
2. Frustration Stage
You become familiar and comfortable with the culture, people, food and language of the host country. You feel less homesick and have made friends that you can rely on.
4. Acceptance Stage
You compare the good and bad of the host country with the good and bad of your home country. You feel less of a foreigner and view the host country as a second home.
Reverse Culture Shock: What, When and How to Cope
Moving home isn't always easy – many feel different and utterly out of touch. This article explains what happens when culture shock is reversed, what to expect, and how to cope with its effects.
Encountering reverse culture shock when returning home is a surprising situation that's overlooked by both expats returning and their businesses calling to come home.
Like culture shock, reverse culture shock has a number of stages; imagine this to be a U-shaped curve. At first, you may be excited to return home – seeing friends and family members, wearing the rest of your wardrobe, and eating at your favorite restaurants.
This initial euphoria eventually wears off and that's when you find yourself feeling out of place in your own culture. This is the experience of reverse culture shock; it's the bottom of the curve and often the roughest part.
The good news is, although it may take time, you will begin a gradual adjustment back towards feeling comfortable with where and whom you are.
How Reverse Culture Shock Happens
“Reverse culture shock is experienced when returning to a place that one expects to be home but actually is no longer and therefore more difficult to manage than outbound shock precisely because it is unexpected and unanticipated,” says Dean Foster, founder and president of DFA Intercultural Global Solutions, a firm that specializes in intercultural training and coaching worldwide.
Foster explains that expats learn over their time in a host country “...to behave and think like the locals, to greater or lesser degrees, while on international assignment.”
“By the time most traditional international assignments come to an end several years may have passed, providing the international assignee a significant amount of time to learn new patterns of behavior and thought necessary to fit into their host country.”
Foster points out that expats returning home are “shocked into the realization that they have in fact changed substantially, usually when they encounter their home culture upon repatriating. Both they and their home culture have changed and this is often the first time that expats have had the opportunity to experience any of these changes.”
What Is Reverse Culture Shock?
As strange as it sounds, expats become less and less familiar with their home stomping grounds. Returning brings a blanket of fog on perception, like an audience member walking around in a setting that’s familiar but still unreal.
Robin Pascoe, author of Homeward Bound, writes: “Re-entry shock is when you feel like you are wearing contact lenses in the wrong eyes. Everything looks almost right.”
Simply put, being an expat is such a lengthy and deep international experience it brings about great professional and personal changes. Old norms and values from your home country are viewed from a fresh perspective, and expats and their families see things in a new light; something like Dorothy going from black and white to Technicolor (The Wizard of Oz).
In addition, expats can begin to feel frustrated or confused when their close friends and family are anything but curious and intrigued about their experience. After all, the expat was gone to a foreign land for years, with sights, sounds and smells exotic and new.
Expats returning home can expect their top re-entry challenges being:
How To Deal With Reverse Shock
Share your experience with others. Although you might feel like no one wants to listen, there will be close ones who will support you with open ears and honest interest.
Start a blog, contact friends you made as an expat or write articles. Find new ways to incorporate your urge to share stories with an audience who will listen intently. Maintain your style and stay international. Things might be different, people (including yourself) might have changed, but this doesn’t mean a 'repat' should give up character and interest learned from abroad just to fit in. Maintain your lifestyle, from the food you ate abroad to the nature of your evolving personality.
“Remember that being flexible and expecting the unexpected helped you get through the difficult times abroad. The same attitude can help you back home,” says the Office of International Studies at Northeastern University.
“Reverse culture shock is a transition, and an important learning experience. Use this time to rebuild relationships, interests and your new worldly self.”
Keeping an international perspective is a special skill not to take for granted or put away. Read international magazines and foreign newspapers, or access news from your host country via websites and forums.
It took over one year for the reverse culture shock to wear off. I had come home on July 5, 2004 and the RCS ended in August of 2005. All of a sudden it was over. One day it was gone. It is different for each person and how they experience it.
I found the following article online and it may help explain culture shock and reverse culture shock better.
The Four Stages of Culture Shock
1. Honeymoon Stage
This happens during the first few days and weeks of being in a new country. People experience emotions like euphoria, excitement, anticipation and eagerness. Everyone and everything is exciting.
2. Frustration Stage
- Difficult sleeping
- Sadness
- Homesickness
- Exhaustion
- Increased worry
- A desire to withdraw
- Unexplained crying
- Overeating
You become familiar and comfortable with the culture, people, food and language of the host country. You feel less homesick and have made friends that you can rely on.
4. Acceptance Stage
You compare the good and bad of the host country with the good and bad of your home country. You feel less of a foreigner and view the host country as a second home.
Reverse Culture Shock: What, When and How to Cope
Moving home isn't always easy – many feel different and utterly out of touch. This article explains what happens when culture shock is reversed, what to expect, and how to cope with its effects.
Encountering reverse culture shock when returning home is a surprising situation that's overlooked by both expats returning and their businesses calling to come home.
Like culture shock, reverse culture shock has a number of stages; imagine this to be a U-shaped curve. At first, you may be excited to return home – seeing friends and family members, wearing the rest of your wardrobe, and eating at your favorite restaurants.
This initial euphoria eventually wears off and that's when you find yourself feeling out of place in your own culture. This is the experience of reverse culture shock; it's the bottom of the curve and often the roughest part.
The good news is, although it may take time, you will begin a gradual adjustment back towards feeling comfortable with where and whom you are.
How Reverse Culture Shock Happens
“Reverse culture shock is experienced when returning to a place that one expects to be home but actually is no longer and therefore more difficult to manage than outbound shock precisely because it is unexpected and unanticipated,” says Dean Foster, founder and president of DFA Intercultural Global Solutions, a firm that specializes in intercultural training and coaching worldwide.
Foster explains that expats learn over their time in a host country “...to behave and think like the locals, to greater or lesser degrees, while on international assignment.”
“By the time most traditional international assignments come to an end several years may have passed, providing the international assignee a significant amount of time to learn new patterns of behavior and thought necessary to fit into their host country.”
Foster points out that expats returning home are “shocked into the realization that they have in fact changed substantially, usually when they encounter their home culture upon repatriating. Both they and their home culture have changed and this is often the first time that expats have had the opportunity to experience any of these changes.”
What Is Reverse Culture Shock?
As strange as it sounds, expats become less and less familiar with their home stomping grounds. Returning brings a blanket of fog on perception, like an audience member walking around in a setting that’s familiar but still unreal.
Robin Pascoe, author of Homeward Bound, writes: “Re-entry shock is when you feel like you are wearing contact lenses in the wrong eyes. Everything looks almost right.”
Simply put, being an expat is such a lengthy and deep international experience it brings about great professional and personal changes. Old norms and values from your home country are viewed from a fresh perspective, and expats and their families see things in a new light; something like Dorothy going from black and white to Technicolor (The Wizard of Oz).
In addition, expats can begin to feel frustrated or confused when their close friends and family are anything but curious and intrigued about their experience. After all, the expat was gone to a foreign land for years, with sights, sounds and smells exotic and new.
Expats returning home can expect their top re-entry challenges being:
- Boredom
- No one wants to listen
- You can’t explain
- Reverse homesickness
- Relationships have changed
- People see 'wrong' changes
- People misunderstand you
- Feelings of alienation
- Inability to apply new knowledge and skills
- Loss/compartmentalization of experience
How To Deal With Reverse Shock
Share your experience with others. Although you might feel like no one wants to listen, there will be close ones who will support you with open ears and honest interest.
Start a blog, contact friends you made as an expat or write articles. Find new ways to incorporate your urge to share stories with an audience who will listen intently. Maintain your style and stay international. Things might be different, people (including yourself) might have changed, but this doesn’t mean a 'repat' should give up character and interest learned from abroad just to fit in. Maintain your lifestyle, from the food you ate abroad to the nature of your evolving personality.
“Remember that being flexible and expecting the unexpected helped you get through the difficult times abroad. The same attitude can help you back home,” says the Office of International Studies at Northeastern University.
“Reverse culture shock is a transition, and an important learning experience. Use this time to rebuild relationships, interests and your new worldly self.”
Keeping an international perspective is a special skill not to take for granted or put away. Read international magazines and foreign newspapers, or access news from your host country via websites and forums.
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